Grape Jello

Today happens to be my birthday. It is not the first of my birthdays which I have spent in Haiti. I don't really like making a big deal about my birthday as believe it or not I am sort of a private person. So you would think hiding out in Haiti would be a perfect place to pass my birthday. To be honest, while I don't like making a big deal about my birthday I do like being around my family on my birthday. And as I sit here tonight I Am thinking about them and I miss them. Thanks to my wife, Facebook, and the translators the children knew it was my birthday so I did get song to in both English and Creole.

I visit d the kids at the centre twice today.  I am trying not to call the place an orphanage, nor do call the kids orphans. They are children living at the centre. It just feel too degrading to me any other way. I visited the. In the morning during which I passed out some small plastic animal. It was fun watching their faces when they saw an animal they could not recognize. The otter seem to cause them the biggest confusion.  We then went back and forth as I learned some animal names in Creole and they learned some animal names in English. The kids have really been patient with me as I bumble through my Creole. They correct my pronunciation and help me restate sentence the correct way. I still feel like I am at the level of a three year old. 

In the afternoon I stopped by again with some coloring books and crayons.  And while I came back with hardly any crayons as I sit here it seems that the children have made remarkable progress in their ability to do a task and to cooperate by sharing resources like crayons. In years past it has been a constant battle to make sure the kids took only a single crayon at a time and then trade it in when they need a new color. It was far from perfect today and some of the little buggers kept trying to trick me and take multiple crayons, for the most part it worked.  Their ability to color within the lines seems to be improving as well. 

When I do visit with the kids I keep wishing that I had something for the older kids. Most crafts brought are really focused on the little ones and the older kids don't have much to do, or it is far beneath their skill level. The other day the decorating of crosses with wood was great for the older kids and I was happy seeing them engaged and challenged. I was thinking it might be nice to get the older kids a dominos or chess set. I have seem older kids living outside the centre playing dominos and thought that might be a good fit. It would have to be something that was understood for the older kids as everything the older kids get the younger want as well. 

I continue to notice two behaviors in the kids and even in broader Haiti that bother me. The first is the quick reaction to violence. What I mean is that when there is a conflict the children are often quick to raise a hand to each other. It is something that is just somewhT accepted in Haiti. Haiti is a tough place and these children have some very tough backgrounds, so this behavior is likely not unexpected and in the US the children would get counciling with how to deal with conflict.  Here the culture is just a bit more direct. I was speaking with a translator and he mentioned it is just the norm and when he was a child he was "beat" by his parents if he came home with a dirty school uniform. He agrees it is not good, but the question is how to change that bit of culture. 

The other behavior that bothers me, and I have written about this before, is the way, in general, the male population treats the female population. The males tend to believe that they can do whatever they want to the females and the females seem to just accept that this is the way it is. You can see this behavior started even in the young kids and I have seen it in general in Haiti. This too is a behavior that must change in order for progress to be made. 

I understand that what I stated above is a generalization and that there are many who don't act this way; but there is a significant populations that does. 

Good news! The building that they are converting into a church at the centre is supposed to have it's first service tomorrow and the kids will be able to attend. Not sure if I will be able to or not as they may expect me at the main church. 

It is a bit odd when the task in front of you is to just be in a place. There are times when I am at the centre and I am not directing crafts, instead I am just there. I am standing or sitting and the kids are just going about their day. Ever now and again one will come over for a hug or chat and then be off. The odd feeling that I am struggling with is that while my brain tells me I am not doing anything and thus fairly useless, something deep seems to be telling me that my task is just to be present. It is a sort of feeling that says your purpose is being there so that the kids know you are for no other reason but to be there. No alterier motive, no planned work, just there. And if t hey need to reach out they will, if they don't need to reach out that is ok, because they know you are there. Not sure that makes sense. But there it is.

Ah, the grape jello. I was all alone for dinner tonight. Saturday is a transition day at the guest house as teams tend to arrive or leave on Saturday. No one  else was about so I started to eat. about halfway though my meal up came one of the women from the kitchen with a bowl full of grape jello for dessert. Dessert is not a normal thing here and they don't know it was my birthday, but it was nice to have a little sweet for a birthday treat. 

Tonight I pray for healing for my wife. She has been under the weather and battling through in my absence. May she get the rest she needs so that her body may heal and that I truly love and appreciat her with all my heart. Amen.